Tag Archives: mind

Elephant’s bathing

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Some days I really feel sad at my weak self control as I fall again and again from whatever baby steps I take in my sadhna Bhakti. Outside I may take bath twice a day but inside I am full of worst what material nature has to offer. And I do feel very sad after failing to control my mind. But what good is that atonement.

in SB 6.1.9 Pariksit Maharaja says: One may know that sinful activity is injurious for him because he actually sees that a criminal is punished by the government and rebuked by people in general and because he hears from scriptures and learned scholars that one is thrown into hellish conditions in the next life for committing sinful acts. Nevertheless, in spite of such knowledge, one is forced to commit sins again and again, even after performing acts of atonement. Therefore, what is the value of such atonement?

He further adds in 6.1.10: Sometimes one who is very alert so as not to commit sinful acts is victimized by sinful life again. I therefore consider this process of repeated sinning and atoning to be useless. It is like the bathing of an elephant, for an elephant cleanses itself by taking a full bath, but then throws dust over its head and body as soon as it returns to the land.

So this is it, my feeling guilty after committing a mistake, is like an elephant’s bath.  And I am so unfortunate that even after getting association of devotees I still can not control it and I continue to fall again and then again. Somedays I just feel helpless in front my mind, inspite of knowing what is good and what is not at all good for my sadhna bhakti.

I can only humbly pray to my spiritual master and to Srila Prabhupada to please give me strength so that I can control my mind; with my own strength and practice I can not reach anywhere in my spiritual journey, this is confirmed.

And I may be the best candidate for their mercy as they won’t get a more fallen person than me.

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on August 20,2013 at 8:12pm

Incense stick

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Incense stick

I was doing my evening kirtan/puja the other day and I saw the burning incense stick.

And in a flash I saw myself in it.

The incense stand is ISKCON, rising up and shining bright in a dull world.

The incense stick is my Guru Maharaj, holding me, without him I am nothing.

The incense on the stick is myself. brown in color, neither good nor bad, a nobody, was living an animal’s life.

Ash signifies that under the protection of Guru and with the association of devotees I am turning white, satvik.

The small black ring ring signify my visible anarthas.

The little red burning ring is the knowledge I am gaining.

And the black burnt part hanging from within the incense stick is my heart, still full of invisible anarthas.

Only by serving servant’s of servant of Sri Guru and Gauranga I hope to overcome every obstacle and develop unalloyed love for Krishna.

All Glories to Sri Sri Guru and Gauranga.

All Glories to Srila Prabhupada

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on July 18,2013 at 9:30pm

A wolf in sheep’s clothing

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Looking good from outside, inside I’m full of lust.

I am worse than a prostitute, I seek bodily pleasure every moment.

My mind gets agitated at the smallest of pretext.

The desire for fame has married sense gratification within me.

And its children have burned  down the small shoots of devotion within my heart, Leaving it hard and black.

I therefore beg Guru and all the Vaisanavas to feel pity on me, please bless me to have continuous association of Sadhus and shastras.

There won’t be a more fallen soul than me to deserve their mercy and to prove that they are all Patita Pavan.

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on May 25, 2013 at 8.52am